May Seas


With every kind of kitchen convenience

With every type of fathomable container

Seems I am kept by this genius

What could be any plainer?

Blessed to have them by day

And VERY blessed to leave them at night

Tis my home away from home

And I’ll never be alone

I tried to set it and forget it

But that theory was false

Although I live without Sunbeam

It saves my skin to gleam

Such a restless spirit nonetheless

In this man-made scheme called progress

Even as my star is an embarrassing red

It could be worse, I could be dead

With Princess Diana and Darling Nicki

The situation gets awfully sticky

Don’t wanna be Goliath going up against David

Let my true path be pave-Ed

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Scandalous Stalking


He spoke of a code to access the stock room
I considered the unsaid possibilities
With this fine, potential cabana boy
As one could expect, there’s a time, place & space for everything
Therefore, I played this foolish game
As I tugged on our drawers
…Oh YES…
(and that is how we score at the store)

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Wings of Protection


In my search for a few good men
My eyes were wide shut then
The legend of my map had faded
The outsiders had me jaded
The last samurai told me, ‘Ask the dust!’
Seems the endless love had me losin’ it
Even so, far and away in oblivion
The color of money was my knight and day
It was risky business without collateral
But my space station was without limits
I printed out a minority report
And misted it with the scent of magnolia
I was captured by a narc
He said I lived a life in pictures!
During my days of thunder
Seems I’d entered war of the worlds
The mummy offered me a cocktail
While the firm decided I was American made
There was a top gun acting as rain man
He suggested I should see lions for lambs
This top gun maverick’s name was Jack Reach her
He had all the right moves
But I kept hearing taps
Seemed he was in Elizabethtown
Later on, I had an interview with the vampire
Again, I heard tropic thunder
It seemed another mission impossible
Yet, the Valkyrie had chosen me
At my edge of tomorrow, Jerry Maguire would hear
My rock of ages while we viewed the vanilla sky.

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And so I took it out of context
Somehow, must have been under a hex
Still, it makes perfect sense
Since I see clearly through my lens

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Making Grade

Sand Dig.jpg

 Explaining & complaining are the crux of all words
Eventually, I clam up since there isn’t any pearl
Of wisdom or of knowledge since it’s all a mystery
And school is out for summer just becoming history
So, the cat doesn’t have my tongue
The mouse ran up the clock
My cat may like to chase it
But it’s thinking of the cock
Which crowed three times again
And it seems I am betrayed
But I don’t let it worry me
Kept scoring making grade

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Follow Me


Follow me down the Apple River
We’ll float on an inner tube
Rather than watching the boob
Yes, I said the Apple River
It’s in Somerset, Wisconsin so we’ll be safe
From those pesky cops on the Interstate
Or if you’re afraid of scraping your buns
On the shallow parts
Or even the rapids that take your fart
On the bumpy rocks, no doubt…
Then maybe just settle for the other Apple
Which one? Take your pick!
The one you taste or the one with selfie stick
But whatever your choice of sensation
Kick off your shoes & enjoy the vacation!
Follow me…Follow me…F-O-L-L-O-W……M-E!

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Cheese, Glorious Cheese


Cheese, Glorious Cheese
So holy & so ripe
Just a tiny piece
To keep me from the gripe
The smell, the aroma
Puts me in a coma
Mice are always trapped
Men are always caught
Of Mice & Men?
What have we bought?
Cheese can’t stand alone
When everyone wants a nibble
Even as we watch Jimmy Kimmel
Cheese Popcorn, it’s Nacho Cheese!
Velveeta & Cheese Whiz?
Already took that quiz
We do smile for the camera
They probably love us better
Let’s all practice saying ‘CHEESE’
While the big doggies left us fleas
And the records we be scratching
Helps us cope with all the latching
Cheese, Glorious Cheese
So holy & so ripe
Just a tiny piece
To keep me from the gripe

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